[dw1/text!] The Cured

[conduit]

[ Rangiku wasn't a stranger to this weekend's strange doings. And, now, more than ever, she's determined to help Johto see the light! That these fourth walls and their extra events are merely alcohol binges that the entire region, from Maria to Jack Skellington, takes part in! ]

Hello, everyone! It's your favorite party girl, Rangiku Matsumoto, reporting in with some helpful tips to make sure your lives continue safely ★~!!

Now, recently, I've been noticing that every six months or so, everyone wakes up with a weird, vague recollection of what happened and a giant headache. Being experienced with hangovers, I decided to make a little faq of what just went on. Well, enjoy!

1. So, what happened this weekend?

Well, simply put, you partied ★! For some reason, you were intoxicated by drinking alcohol, one of the best things there is to enjoy in Johto, or in any world! How this happened, or why this happened, isn't very known! Perhaps all of the water turns into saké as part of a Team Rocket evil plot, or something in the air makes you wanna drink, or maybe it's just a festival that no one could remember but point is you got wasted. If you rarely drink, you probably vomited in someone's hair, and made a fool of yourself in public doing humiliating things you would have never done if you had an ounce of sobriety on you ★!

But, most of us, who can handle their drinking, just merely passed out. No biggie ★! So, somewhere along the lines, you just got drunk, somehow, and passed out after doing some very questionably possible things. You might be able to remember vague insane experiences, but, please be assured, it was only the alcohol processing that info, and, sometimes saké gives you wild dreams ★!

2. So, what are the effects now?

The inability to recall what happened the previous night is the biggest one and a sign that you definitely partied hard. Another sign is waking up in strange places you don't recall ever visiting ★! Other side effects include headache, nausea, sensitivity to light and sound, lethargy, intense feelings of depression, thirst, and diarrhea ★! Rest assured though, as the latter symptoms are very rare and Johto's bathrooms are eternally clean! (I hope!)

3. How can I cure it?
Well, speaking from personal experience of over two centuries of unsobriety, these remedies have varying levels of success.

A. Drink. Like A Fish

No, seriously ★! The more water you have, the more your body is able to feel better. You're super dehydrated after you go on these wild alcohol binges so you'll feel a lot better if you just get some liquid back into you!

B. Vitamin B6
Studies have shown that not only taking several hundred times the recommended amount of a daily intake isn't fatal for you, but it also helps your hangover!

C. Pokélyte!
Or any drink that gives you more electrolytes! Feraligatrade and Psyducmax are excellent examples of these types of drinks!


D. Drink more Alcohol!
My favorite cure! The party don't stop, no! Just drink until your hangover goes away! It'll stave off the symptoms and buy you time to try the rest of these to kill it for good!

E. Food and Water
Food absorbs the alcohol quicker, so just eat tons of noodles and you'll be feeling better in no time ★!

F. Oxygen!

Just get some more, somehow ★!

G. Tons of Honey and/or Sugar!
Cure your sweet tooth as you drink! My personal favorite if you like drinking tea, so make some for a deadly hangover killing mix ★!

H. Artichoke
If you're boring!

There are many more odd remedies, so, if these somehow don't do it for you, just let me know and I'll be able to prescribe some more ★! Anything to help my fellow Johto-ians! Anyways, I hope your hangovers ease up just as much as mine do!

The doctor is out ★~!

Comments

no problem, hon! <3

[when_turks_fly]

Possible yes. Looks like Johto's got me mixing them up now.

[ Sounds like someone had a very good dream and blessing! ]

You're probably right. I might try this list out if I ever find a decent place to drink in Johto. [ And, you know, she can trust Lea to stay in bed, not follow her, and, or get into any trouble long enough for her to to have a decent number of drinks. Not that she ever completely lets go, but... ] You wouldn't happen to know any good places, would you?

[conduit]

Stupid Johto! Why does it have to treat us kindly only 361 days out of the year!

[ A blessing from the pokédeities! ]

Of course I'd know some places! Whatever you do, don't go to the bar in Azaleatown! It's seriously crappy. The bar in Mahogany is very nice from what I've heard! The bars in Goldenrod are pretty swell, though, if I say so myself. I've never been to Olivine but I'm sure Olivine has one that overlooks the cliff...

That's pretty dangerous so maybe I shouldn't go to that one, ehe!

[when_turks_fly]

I'm not entirely sure I want to know what kind of answer it would give us.

[ Although, in retrospect, maybe she would. ]

I'll probably check out a few of the bars in Goldenrod when I get there, then. It's too bad you can't order alcohol and have it delivered through the PC like you can so many other things

Maybe not. My name's Valeria, by the way. You're Miss Matsumoto, correct?

[conduit]

It probably wouldn't give us any answer at all!

You can have it delivered to your place of residence though~! And yes, I'm Rangiku Matsumoto! Please, call me Rangiku, cause Miss Matsumoto is way too formal! It's very nice to meet you Valeria!

[when_turks_fly]

You're probably right.

You mean you can order alcohol through the catalog? How did I miss this? Rangiku then. It's nice to meet you, too!

[conduit]

You actually call a bar, and then you request delivery. Most are surprisingly okay with delivering alcohol! It's how I get more alcohol if I'm too drunk to move!

[when_turks_fly]

I might just do that then if the delivery fees aren't too outrageous. You're must really like booze a lot!

[conduit]

Of course I do! I was able to make a guide on it! The shipping and handling isn't very large though. It's usually under 5$ at the most~!

[when_turks_fly]

That's a pretty good deal. I'll definitely look into it. It would be nice to sit up one night with a bottle, even more so if I had somebody to drink it with.

[conduit]

Ooh! I'll drink with you! I always enjoy making new friends and drinking with them~! [ Rangiku pridefully beams as she just has one thought on her mind: free drinks. ]

[when_turks_fly]

[ Oh, Rangiku. Lucky for her, Valeria really doesn't mind. She's honestly more of a social drinker. ]

Next time we're in the same town, then.

[conduit]

Excellent! Have any idea when you'll end up in Goldenrod~?

[when_turks_fly]

Not at the moment. Lea and I are currently working in Violet and training our Pokemon up for the journey ahead. It beats spending four weeks in every town.

[conduit]

You're only in Violet?! But you seem like you know so much about this place!!

I hear you on that. I tagged around with someone who wanted to go to the gyms ASAP but I wanted to go slower. As a result, I now have to get the badges cause I never challenged a gym! [ Rangiku this doesn't really affirm their opinion… ]

[when_turks_fly]

I've been in Johto twice before.

At least you'll be prepared when you do go to get the badges? It'll probably take less time since you won't have to stop in every town to train your Pokémon up to an appropriate level to challenge the next gym.

[conduit]

Twice?! Good lord! They just don't know where to put you, huh?! [ Holy hell! That's some serious revolving dor stuff going on. ]

Nope! With my level 100s, they'll be instantly pulverized! [ WOO GO HER.... ]

[when_turks_fly]

Not really, no. I'm not complaining, though. I got to come back with my memories and Johto did give me a gift after I got back.

[ Namely Lea, little brother figure and shenanigans expert extraordinaire. It's a start in this place's apology. ]

Maybe Kanto'll provide you with more of a challenge.

[conduit]

Ooh?! What gift was it?! Was it a billion poké? [ if it is, you're treating her to drinks for life! ] I suppose having your memories is better than starting all over for the third time.

I hope not! I like things being easy as they are!

[when_turks_fly]

A billion poké? No, this gift is worth much more than that. Priceless, I'd say. It was a friend of mine, one of the first I made in Johto, and... yeah. I'm really glad I have memories.

Well, I suppose you did earn it.

[conduit]

Awww! It must be nice to come back here to friends that obviously care about you. A reunion like that is once in a lifetime. And it's fantastic to see that you aren't wasting that opportunity. [ She knows what it's like to waste an opportunity like that ): It usually ends with eternal separation. ]

[when_turks_fly]

Thanks, Rangiku. It really is and I wouldn't waste it for the world.

[conduit]

You sound like an amazing loyal friend! You must be one of the most loyal people in Johto!

[when_turks_fly]

[ And then, there was almost a keysmash. ]

I don't know about that, but thanks.

[conduit]

[ !!! ]

You're quite welcome, Valeria!

[when_turks_fly]

So, what are you going to do now, Rangiku?